But apparently it’s like a muscle-if you don’t flex it every day then it atrophies. I’ve read other blog posts lamenting the effects of too much screen time and felt smug: Well just go outside then. It’s not that hard. Except huh, it seems to have gotten hard for me, and I get it in a way I didn’t before.
Having a new job with a normal schedule has freed up so much time for me. I have all sorts of plans, and lists, and Pinterest boards. I’ve even done some of the stuff on said lists and Pinterest boards, lest I be one of those people who’s all inspiration and no execution. But…I haven’t done enough. I spend most of my hours at home glued to my iPhone screen until my Google reader is exhausted. Then, I bounce around between Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram. Then I bounce around between games. I don’t even read anymore without taking a phone break. Uh, what? I used to read for hours…now it’s like I don’t let myself get lost in a good book anymore.
And even when I am motivated to start a new project I go out, buy supplies, start…and never finish. I have sooo many different supplies, and so many craft books. And so many collections and so many things to decorate the house with. And a gym membership. And a dog that needs walked instead of just let out in the backyard. And house that needs cleaned, that my husband even did a major chunk of the spring cleaning on but I haven’t helped at all. And some herbs in pots and a lot of seed packets. And and and.
And what do I do? Read blogs about other people doing stuff. And then feel bad that even when I do stuff, it’s not as cool as what I see on the internet. Yeah, for real the internet has become like high school for me: I keep comparing myself to people that seem perfect and judging myself as less cool/organized/crafty/fit then them, which then eats away my confidence, even though no one is saying mean stuff about me except for me (well, that part is different from high school, but those kids were WRONG). It’s not fun to realize that you’re the mean girl…to yourself.
I’m embarking on a mission to change that. To begin, I’m using a concept I’ve always admired, from Ali Edwards, and picking my one little word: Execute. To carry out; accomplish; to perform or do; to produce in accordance with a plan or design. It’s decisive. It’s no-nonsense and brooks no excuses. It’s exactly what I need.